Red Is A Flavor

I have always hated running. It was one of those things that just seemed pointless, mindless, and boring to do. I tried a few times in my life to pick up on it, but it always failed for some reason or another.

I’ve recently decided to take it up again. Read on and follow my progress.

My History of Running

I started running (briefly) in 1994 in preparation for Basic Training. If I remember correctly, I only ran for 3-4 weeks prior to heading to Texas. But…once there (in Basic), I ran my ass of!
In 1996 I began going to the base gym and running as long as I could on the indoor track. This lasted a couple of months until I was bored again.

Needless to say, running has never kept my attention.

Since yesterday’s post was about “online deals”, I thought I’d share some of my tips for offline, or brick and mortar deals.

My secret to offline deals is to “learn” the stores that you have access to. By this, I mean find out when new trucks come in, figure out what their “hot sellers” are, and figure out what does not sell well at the store. For instance, if your Target or Walmart is right next door to Home Depot, chances are pretty good you’ll get deals in the hardware and garden departments.

On to the sources….

Target

In my opinion Target is the best place to frequent for clearance deals for two reasons. First, it is obvious Target’s goal with their clearance is to get it the hell out of the store. They don’t put items at 5% off like WalMart does. Target usually starts at 30%, then moves to 50% and 75% pretty quickly.

The second reason Target is clearance king, is due to their stock turnover/change. Be it Easter, School Start, Cookout season, tax season, whatever, Target alters its stock. Change in theme, means they have to make room for the new stuff.

Clearance items are almost always on the endcaps facing away from the main aisles of the store. Also, they put little round red flags on clearance items on the shelves. I have mastered the “Target Deal Hunting Pattern” in my local Targets. I can get in and out in less than 5 minutes.

Target clearance used to be a little known, cult-ish kind of thing. Now it is humerous to see a bunch of people walking the back aisles of the store….we know what you are doing!

My Best Deals – Too many to list!

WalMart

Apparently WalMart likes their shelves to look as trashy as the rest of the store, so they only take 10% or 15% off clearance items. Sometimes they setup those “clearance aisles”, but they are truly full of the crappyest-crap WalMart has.

Walmart has only been a good place for clearance when you happen to stumble on the “1/2 off clearance” announcements.

Overall, WalMart is not the place for dirt-cheap deals, but it is definately worth the look to compare prices.

In an upcoming blog, I’ll explain my “WalMart – A Phase in Life” theory.

My Best Deals (that I can remember) – $5 Laser Tape measure and a $.50 Laser Level.

Pawn Shops

Until recently, most pawn shops were shady places trying to make money from everyone, the pawner and the purchaser. Now there are chain pawn shops (i.e. Cash America), that focus on the pawn. Establishments that do this, don’t want to keep unclaimed merchandise on hand, they want to sell it quick to cash out of it.

If you are looking for large sporting good items, stereo equipment, DVDs, CDs, and occasionally kitchen stuff, check out the “nicer” pawn shops every now and then.

My Best Deal – $35 Gaggia Espresso Machine (retails for over $500, I sold it for $250 on Ebay).

Big Lots

Home of Christmas crap in August! I swear BigLots moves up the stocking of Christmas stuff two weeks.

Sports Authority

This place has the tendency to have a lot of unadvertised sales. For instance, they will put all of a particular type of item 1/2 off.

My Best Deal – $69 HydroSlide ProXL Kneeboard (retail $175)

I originally came up with this idea about 5 or 6 years ago (1999ish). I’ve since shared it with a few people whenever we get on the alien or evolution topic. Some think is way out there, but most think that it makes more sense that the existing ideas or theories, the more you think about it, the more it makes sense.

I have other World altering ideas too, but don’t want to give them all to you at once! Baby steps!

Introduction

Grays or Aliens.You know what I’m talking about; the creatures you see in all of the alien autopsy shows, the beings so many people say they have deju vu memories of. The ones that supposedly landed at Roswell.

In the following paragraphs I will explain my idea/hypothesis; that the aliens are not aliens at all, but rather scientists and exploring humans from the future.

It sounds a little far fetched, but read on I’ve actually thought this out

Evolution of Species

Wait! I know you are thinking “oh no, creationism verses evolution”, but I’m look at evolution not as the beginning, but rather evolution of species that already exist. One does not have to subscribe to Darwins Origin of Species to know that animals and humans adapt and evolve to their environment. Evolution doesn’t stop…humans are still evolving.

For example, research has shown since the industrial revolution, the average size of the human head as grown. Hem…makes you think.more information in the environment, the larger storage unit required. This is officially called “Selection and Adaption”.

The No Heavy Lifting, Visual Environment

First, knowing that all animals, including humans, adapt and change to meet the needs of their environment, lets now look at the environment technology is creating for us. The environment which we are all adapting and evolving to.

With the advent of computers, the Internet, most of our absorption of the environment around us is solely visual. When is the last time you smelled or felt a webpage? How many conversations do you now have visually rather than vocally, prior to chat and Instant Message? How much of what you know did you learn from TV, computers, or books? You know that a lightning bolt can kill you, but you didn’t learn that by getting struck, right? You learned it visually.

Our eyes have become the single greatest input/receptor humans have. Knowing that we evolve and adapt to our environments…what do you think will happen to our eyes over time, as we evolve in this environment?

Secondly, when is the last time you heaved your own logs up to your house to build a wall? When is the last time you picked up a 78RPM record to put on your record player? It is more likely that you have your iPod pre-programmed to select the songs you want, or you can gently push a button. Ever heard of the Roomba vacuum? Starting to sounds like the Jetsons, isnt it? It should, because that is exactly what is happening. Technology and automation are eliminating the need and requirement of physical excursion. You dont need to look far to see proof of this in the United States. Our population has become the fattest and laziest group of humans on the planet. Europe and Asia are catching up to us with this lazy causing environment too.

What do you think will happen over time when humans stop using the muscles in their extremities as often? What does happen when you dont use your muscles now? They shrink!

Are you starting to form a mental picture yet or what humans might look like in the future? Bigger heads, bigger eyes, smaller arms and legs.Once we trash the atmosphere a little more, we will not be able to go outside during the day, thus UV will be a thing of the past. What do you think human skin would look like without UV? When do most abductions supposedly take place? Day or night? Makes you think, doesn’t it?

Science, Archeology & Time Travel

Humor me.image that ump-teen thousand or millions of years in the future, it is announced to the world that a Time Machine had been built that allows time travel to any point in the past, and allows them to bring things back to the future.

Albert Einstein theorized that time travel to the future was possible, if one could gain enough speed. Would it be that far fetched to think the opposite? A basic theory of science is everything has an opposite, up has down, hot has cold, yin has yang.

Think it out…what would it be used for? Time travel would be the most powerful tool ever invented. Imagine…we could force Hitler’s mom to have an abortion, we could be prepared for Pearl Harbour, we could save the dodo, and we could have saved all of David Lindseys hair. Entire races could be wiped out; entire countries could be stopped before they are even formed, we could buy stock in Apple and Microsoft in 1980!

If it were invented today I think I can make an educated guess what would happen. Powers that would be (i.e. World Governments) would control it, just as Nuclear power and weapons are. People wouldnt have time machines in their garages; the power would be limited to government and scientific needs. Um, did I just say scientific…hem?

Imagine if at this point when the time machine is built, years in the future, humans still have not found the cure for the common cold. Imagine if AIDS becomes as common as athletes foot. How does science find cures? By finding and isolating the cause!

A time machine would enable scientists of the future, to pin-point the cause of cancer, hang nails, Flarfegnitis (made that one up), by examining perfect specimens from the past. Living specimens!! What happens now-a-days when we find a human or animal frozen in the Artic Tundra (which is a present day equal to the above idea)? WE EXAMINE IT!!

But if we did any of this, how would it affect the current world? Think McFly! What is the simple rule of time travel? We all know it…think Delorean; Michael J. Fox. Do not disturb the past as it will affect the future.

It would be imperative that the future human time travelers try to put things back the way they were, so as not to change the future.

There are a lot of blanks that I could continue to fill in, but undoubtedly you are already thinking about them and filling them in yourself, so no need to go into the obvious. Just let your mind ponder the possibilities and the realities, and form your own ideas.

Conclusion

My Alien Theory is just an idea I’ve had and shared with people over the years. There is no proof to it, no evidence to support it. I’ve actually thought that this would be an awesome background for a fiction book to write. You may be reading one of the first published works of the next Dan Brown!?

The whole idea I presented is much more feasible to those that subscribe to evolution rather than creationism, simply due to the randomness that the human race exists at all.

What are the chances of evolution happening somewhere else in the universe resulting in a humanoid (two legs, two arms, head on top) creature. If the Theory of Evolution is in fact true, it is more likely that earth bound human are the only ones that ended up looking like us. If life evolved somewhere else, chances are it would look nothing like humans do.

With this thinking, it would mean that the Aliens that people report seeing, are merely humans from another place that is unseen or another time.

Time travel into the past, would be the single greatest archeology and scientific tool ever created, at any point in time, now or a million years in the future. Humans of the future will have the same interests into the past as we do today.

The greatest gift to or result of (depends which you believe) humankind is free thought and free will. Use it to look at the world around you and form your own opinions. Just because 1, 100, 1,000 or 1,000,000 people believe something to be true, doesnt make it so.

[UPDATE] Since my original post of this in April (on MySpace), I did a little research and found out my idea is not new. In fact there are actually books written about it. Dammit…there goes that early retirement! Back to the whiteboard.